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ArabicGenshin Impact: A Guide to the Unofficial History of Teyvat — Chapter 14
Chapter 14: He Didn’t Deny It! He Tacitly Admitted It!
Hu Tao’s plum blossom-shaped pupils suddenly lit up with the brilliance of a merchant discovering a vein of pure gold. Her gaze swept back and forth between Zhongli’s perfectly composed face and that shocking little booklet resting on the table. The more she looked, the more the bizarre pieces seemed to click together. The more she pondered, the more a highly suspicious scent seemed to waft through the quiet air of the parlor.
“Wait…” She leaned in close, her face stopping mere inches from the consultant’s unruffled features. Her nose twitched slightly, as though she could physically sniff out his deepest secrets.
Zhongli calmly leaned his upper body back, maintaining a perfectly polite distance. “Hall Master?”
“Consultant…” Hu Tao drawled the word out, her bright eyes narrowing into sharp, inquisitive slits. “You just said that the Lord of Geo wanders the mortal world and should naturally have no connection with a lack of funds?”
“Based on universal rationality, that is indeed the case.” Zhongli nodded, his tone as steady as bedrock.
“Then what about you?” Hu Tao threw the curveball without a second of hesitation. “You are well-versed in both ancient and modern history. You possess vast knowledge of every artifact and custom in Liyue. Even the Northland Bank recognizes your personal guarantee. By all rights, a man of your stature shouldn’t always forget to bring Mora either, right?”
There was an extremely subtle pause in Zhongli’s motion. His fingers, elegantly holding the rim of his teacup, froze for a fraction of a second. Had Hu Tao not been staring at him with the intensity of a hunting hawk, it would have been nearly impossible to detect.
He lowered the cup and spoke with mild indifference. “As a mortal body, occasional oversights are only natural. Such mundane errors cannot be compared to a deity’s absolute lack of need to carry currency.”
“Oh? Really?” Hu Tao crossed her arms and began pacing slow circles around his chair. She muttered loud enough for everyone in the room to hear. “But why do I feel that these oversights of yours are a bit too frequent? They give off a very strong sense of deja vu.”
She stopped abruptly in front of him and began snapping her fingers to count off her points.
“First! The Lord of Geo’s incarnation in the story, Young Master Jueyun Chili, was elegant in every conceivable way and spent money like water, but he never actually brought any on his person. And you, the esteemed Consultant of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, are deeply learned with top-tier taste, yet you also never bring a single Mora!”
“Second!” She held up another finger. “In the Record of Shi Po’s Wanderings, it explicitly states that the Lord of Geo reaching into his sleeves for money is a habit of a thousand years. Consultant, every single time you pay a bill, you naturally and rightfully reach into your sleeves. After discovering your pockets are empty, your expression… Tsk. It is not annoyance. It is not shame. It is a kind of subtle surprise. A look that says, ‘Hmm? Why is it not here this time?’ That exact reaction is written word-for-word in the book!”
The parlor attendant standing near the doorway listened with her eyes widening to the size of saucers. She subconsciously slapped a hand over her mouth, her gaze darting frantically between the eccentric Hall Master and the stoic consultant in a messy blend of horror and sheer excitement.
Zhongli kept his gaze level. “…This is a mere coincidence. It is a habitual movement that many ordinary people share.”
“Third!” Hu Tao completely ignored his defense. Her voice climbed an octave in her mounting excitement. “That book Synthesized God says the Lord of Geo possesses the boldness of ‘Mora’, meaning he wants to buy everything, and the composure of ‘Rex’, meaning he remains completely unphased even when flat broke! Consultant, your ‘I want it all’ posture when buying expensive goods, and that rock-solid aura you project when you cannot pay the tab… it is as if the merchant should be ashamed for even asking! It is a perfect match!”
She clapped her hands together, bouncing on her heels. “And there is more! The Lord of Geo is knowledgeable and knows everything from ancient to modern times. You? You are exactly the same. The Lord of Geo speaks like an old-timer and loves using the phrase ‘universal rationality’. You? ‘Based on universal rationality’ is practically your catchphrase!”
Zhongli finally let out a soft, measured sigh. He set his teacup down on the wooden table. The fine porcelain made a crisp clink in the quiet room.
“Hall Master, there is more than one person in this vast world who is learned and steady in speech. To infer such a grand conclusion based on these minor traits is somewhat too arbitrary.”
“Arbitrary?” Hu Tao’s eyes curved into crescent moons, resembling a little fox that had just spotted a fatal flaw in its prey’s defense. “Fine then. Let me ask you this, Consultant. Do you not know a bit too much about our Lord of Geo? Every single time Rex Lapis is mentioned, you always have something deeply insightful to add. And that tone you use when you comment… Tsk. It is as familiar and casual as if you were talking about your own elderly relative!”
She leaned in again, dropping her voice into a dramatic, conspiratorial whisper. “Consultant Zhongli… tell me the truth. Could you be a distant relative of the Lord of Geo? Or… are you actually an illuminated beast who secretly descended to experience mortal life? Or maybe…”
A bolder, far more absurd thought suddenly crashed into Hu Tao’s mind. The sheer weight of the idea made her freeze in place. She looked down at the copy of Regarding the Matter of the Geo Archon Being a Synthesized God Who Caused His Wife’s Death in her hands, and then back up at the handsome, extraordinary, knowledgeable, and perpetually penniless consultant sitting before her.
A bizarre possibility made her scalp tingle.
She took a sharp intake of breath. Her voice jumped in pitch, trembling with absolute disbelief. “…No. No way. Could you actually be Rex?!”
Zhongli blinked.
“You are the surviving half!” Hu Tao gasped, pointing an accusing finger at his chest. “The half synthesized from Mora and Rex! You are the steady and reticent Rex, but later you had to become a bit more talkative because you lost your Mora half! So you refuse to create Mora because it reminds you of your tragic, sad memories of your lost wife! And that is why you are using the alias Zhongli now!”
The parlor attendant dropped her cleaning rag. It hit the floorboards with a wet splat.
Zhongli remained entirely motionless.
Even for the Geo Archon himself, a martial god who had weathered over six thousand years of bloodshed and witnessed countless absurdities across the ages, this was entirely unmatched. Facing the Hall Master’s shocking conclusion, a deduction that aggressively mashed together the latest trashy unofficial history with a bizarre yet strangely self-consistent internal logic, he fell into complete, utter silence.
For the very first time in recent memory, a clear and genuine daze clouded those ancient golden-amber eyes.
For a long moment, one could hear a pin drop inside the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. The only sound in the room was Hu Tao’s rapid breathing, her chest heaving from the sheer thrill of her own over-excitement.
After what felt like an eternity, Zhongli slowly raised a hand and pressed his fingers against his temples. A heavy wave of exhaustion seemed to radiate from his posture.
He opened his mouth as if to formulate a correction, but the words died in his throat. It only turned into a long, deeply helpless sigh. His breath stirred the nearly invisible ripples on the surface of the tea that had long since gone cold in his cup.
“…Hall Master.” His voice carried a trace of deep powerlessness that had rarely surfaced in the past millennium. “Your imagination… has truly crossed certain boundaries.”
He lowered his hand, his expression returning to a smooth, unreadable mask. “Whether it is forgetting to bring money or the concept of a Synthesized God, these are all things described in fictional folk tales. They cannot be taken as truth.”
He slowly stood up. His movements remained as elegant and composed as ever, though the sudden draft of air brought by his dark sleeves brushing against the tabletop seemed just a fraction more hurried than his usual leisurely pace.
“Hall Master,” Zhongli continued in a perfectly calm tone, showing absolutely no sign of internal panic. “I have suddenly recalled a prior appointment with the owner of the tea house today. We are meant to discuss a newly arrived batch of premium tea leaves. Please excuse me for now.”
With that, and without waiting for Hu Tao to formulate a response, he turned and walked out of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. His steps were steady, neither too fast nor too slow.
However, to the parlor attendant who was secretly peeking from the corner, the consultant’s broad back somehow seemed to carry a distinct hint of eagerness to escape this place of trouble.
Hu Tao stared at the empty doorway for a second before suddenly stomping her foot against the floorboards. She spun around and grabbed the stunned attendant by the shoulders.
“Did you see that!” Hu Tao cheered. “He didn’t deny it! He tacitly admitted it! Quick! Go to the bookhouse and buy another copy each of Record of Shi Po’s Wanderings and Synthesized God. This Hall Master needs to study them word by word, in absolute depth!”
She blinked, suddenly slapping her own forehead. “Oh, right! I need to go ask around the harbor and find out who this Li Xin really is!”
She snatched the two shocking booklets off the table. “I will borrow these two first!”
Hu Tao swept out of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor like a reddish-brown gale, leaving the poor attendant standing alone by the empty tea table, giggling nervously to herself.
The attendant finally snapped out of her daze and shouted toward the open street. “Hall Master! The Lord of Geo has already passed away during the Rite of Descension! Please do not make too much of a fuss!”
Hu Tao’s voice drifted back on the wind. “Oh, I know, I know!”
Meanwhile, as Zhongli walked onto the sunlit streets of Liyue Harbor, his gaze swept over the bustling crowds. Everywhere he looked, citizens were gathered in small clusters, heatedly discussing the secret news of the Archon.
Hearing their dramatic exclamations of ‘So that is how it is’, ‘How deep-seated their love was’, and ‘No wonder he never shows his face’, his thousand-year-unchanging composed expression finally cracked. A heavy sigh escaped his lips, dissipating into the salty sea breeze blowing in from the docks.
“Li Xin…” He repeated the pen name in a low, dangerous murmur, his golden eyes narrowing slightly against the sunlight.
“It seems I need to find some time to personally visit the Sanyu Bookstore for a thorough perusal.”
Far away from the brewing chaos, Lovia did not yet know that the literary bomb she had casually dropped had not only shocked all of Liyue Harbor, but had even alerted the divine protagonist of the story himself.
At this very moment, she was huddled comfortably inside her small, run-down rented room. She happily munched on a freshly bought skewer of grilled tiger fish, her cheeks puffing out as she chewed. She patted her swelling Mora pouch with pure satisfaction, her mind racing with ideas on how to write Stone Amber’s Leisurely Travelogue, part two to ensure it became an even bigger bestseller.
A massive storm was gathering right over her head.
And the little Melusine writer remained completely unaware, happily sprinting headlong down the path of seeking her own doom.