Genshin Impacti: This Priest is Cringe, But She's Also Unbeatable — Chapter 12

Chapter 12: A Flash of Purple! My New Persona is an All-Purpose Maid?!You're reading this on the wrong site. This chapter was translated by Elysian Reads and posted for free at elysianreads.com — if you're seeing it anywhere else, it was copied without permission. Read it at the source so the people who actually did the work get the credit.

Night had fallen, blanketing the world in silence.

Celeste sat cross-legged on her bed, her posture as straight as a pine—an indelible mark of the Millelith training that had been carved into her very bones.

Though her eyes saw nothing but the dim light of her room, her consciousness had submerged itself completely into a private universe of shimmering stars. There, on the system interface, the icon for the 【Newbie Welfare Pool (Limited)】 pulsed with a lethal, irresistible temptation.

“1,462 points…” she whispered, the number a soft breath in the quiet. Her fingertips tapped an unconscious, accelerating rhythm against her knees, her heartbeat quickening with every beat.

A bitter tide of memories surged forth from her past life: the agony of countless failed gacha pulls, the feeling of her blood pressure spiking as her savings vanished into the digital ether. This phantom pain now mingled with a fresh, potent thirst for the unknown, fermenting into a tremor that left her palms slick with sweat. Adding to the mix was a deep-seated, hereditary unease—the curse of an “African Chieftain’s” luck.

Her thoughts flickered to the system’s treacherous Overtones and the Venti trial card she had sealed away, too afraid to use it lightly.

‘Whether I’m lucky or not, it all comes down to this,’she thought, her internal voice taking on an almost prayer-like tone.’System, please, just bless me this once. At least give me a character card I can actually use!’Her gaze drifted to the system inventory, landing on the Black Tassel Spear (Pink Skin Version) that had served her so well for days. She offered a silent plea to her trusty weapon.’Old partner, lend me some of that European energy!’

Focusing her mind, she took a deep, steadying breath and, with a solemn surge of will, slammed the virtual 【Ten-Pull】 button.

Bzz—

There was no world-shaking roar, only a faint hum that echoed deep within her mind.

In the next instant, a brilliant light erupted from the center of the system interface. Ten meteors blazed forth, trailing long tails of fire as they streaked across her vision, carving ten incandescent trajectories through the starry void.

White, white, green, white…

A series of dim, disappointing flashes flickered past, and the hope in Celeste’s eyes began to fade with them.

[Ding! Obtained: Mora x 5000! (White)]

[Ding! Obtained: Teyvat Fried Egg x 3! (White)]

[Ding! Obtained: Sweet Madame x 5! (Green)]

[Ding! Obtained: Credit Points x 10000! (White)]

[Ding! Obtained: Mondstadt Hash Brown x 2! (Blue)]

[Ding! Obtained: Hidden Blade x 1! (Blue)]

[Ding! Obtained: Hidden Blade x 1! (Blue)]

Seven lights dissipated into nothingness.

It was a total wash. All of it was familiar materials, food, and a couple of low-tier weapons she had no immediate use for.

Celeste’s heart sank, stone by heavy stone, and that familiar, gut-twisting ache of disappointment returned. This scene, this damned “blue sky and white clouds” gacha result, was a horrifying flashback to the years of torment she’d endured at the hands of unforgiving games in her past life.

‘Fine,’she thought, already building her psychological defenses and forcibly suppressing her unrealistic expectations.’A purple weapon for the pity is acceptable. It’s better than nothing…’

Just as she was steeling herself to accept her fate and begin calculating how to use the meager materials—

The eighth light exploded.

It was a deep, brilliant, unmistakable purple!

Amidst the radiant glow, the outline of an ancient, imposing claymore slowly materialized.

[Ding! Obtained: Favonius Greatsword x 1! (Purple)]

“A weapon! A purple weapon!”

Celeste’s breath caught in her throat. Her eyes, which had dimmed with resignation, were instantly reignited with a blazing fire. It wasn’t the character card she desperately craved, but a solid, purple-quality weapon was still a massive win!

She fought down the urge to immediately equip it, her eyes glued to the screen as the gacha animation continued.

‘Good, the pity really did kick in!’

The ninth light was another familiar blue—two more Mondstadt Hash Browns.

This was it. The last pull. The pity had already been used up, so this one was almost guaranteed to be fodder.

Celeste relaxed completely. Getting the Favonius Greatsword already made this ten-pull a huge success. The public humiliation she’d endured during the arena match hadn’t been for nothing, after all.

However.

At the very moment the tenth and final meteor leaped from the pool—

A pillar of light, deeper and more dazzling than the purple that had come before, erupted with blinding violence. It was a color so rich and deep it seemed to have condensed the entire starry sea into a single point.

Her entire field of vision was swallowed by the brilliant, majestic purple!

[Ding! Congratulations, Host! Obtained: Permanent Character Card – Noelle x 1! (Purple)]

A… a purple character card?!

Celeste’s brain stuttered to a halt for a full half-second.

The next moment, a tidal wave of pure, unadulterated joy crashed over her, instantly drowning her rationality.and support the real translator.Read at elysianreads.com This is a stolen translation. You're reading this on the wrong site. This chapter was translated by Elysian Reads and posted for free at elysianreads.com — if you're seeing it anywhere else, it was copied without permission. Read it at the source so the people who actually did the work get the credit.

It wasn’t a golden five-star legend, but it was a permanent, real-deal character card! This was so far beyond her wildest, most optimistic expectations that it felt unreal.

“Noelle! It’s Noelle!”

She almost cried out loud, her hands clenching into tight fists, her nails digging deep into her palms. She used the sharp sting of pain to confirm that she wasn’t dreaming.

Within the fading light, the card rotated slowly, revealing its art.

A young woman clad in silver-white and dark gray maid-like armor stood there quietly. Her ash-gold hair was cut short, falling softly around her shoulders, and her emerald-green eyes were clear and resolute. A gentle yet incredibly reliable smile graced her lips.

【Noelle (Permanent)】

【Type: Character Card (4-star)】

【Description: After use, you can transform into the Apprentice Knight of the Knights of Favonius, Noelle, gaining all her combat skills and Talents. During the transformation, the corresponding outfit is automatically equipped (System Adaptive Version).】

【Attached Life Skill: All-Purpose Housekeeping (Mastery)】

【Note: Leave it to me! You can leave anything to me! Whether it’s cleaning the battlefield or cleaning a room.】

【Favonius Greatsword】

【Type: Claymore】

【Description: A standard-issue greatsword of the Knights of Favonius. Wielding it requires considerable arm strength. Only the truly strong can bring out its proper power.】

【Note: Light… light as a feather? (Experience of a certain Maid Knight who wishes to remain anonymous)】

The purple light finally faded, and the interface returned to its calm, starry state.

Celeste remained in her cross-legged posture, but the heart in her chest was pounding against her ribs like a war drum.

She’d pulled it. She’d actually pulled a character card!

And not just any card—it was Noelle! The six-sided, all-around warrior jokingly called a “Humanoid Gundam” and the “Geo Archon Empress” in the game!

She could fight! She could tank! She could heal!

Activating her ultimate turned her into a battlefield meat grinder!

With this card, her weaknesses—her lack of area-of-effect damage and her struggles against heavily-armored foes—would be completely erased! She could already picture it: a critical Domain match, her sister Selene overextended and in danger, and then she, Celeste, would descend from the heavens like a valkyrie…

But just as the tide of elation reached its peak, the combined forces of her past-life streamer memories and her current-life high schooler’s sense of shame sounded the highest level of alarm.

Wait a minute.

Transform into Noelle?

Didn’t that mean she would have to wear that iconic Maid Knight armor, complete with the frilly, flowing skirt?

And she’d have to wield that door-sized Favonius Greatsword?

That image…

The memory of transforming into Pela during the arena match—pushing up non-existent glasses while reciting cringey lines—was still vivid enough to make her want to dig a fantasy castle with her toes in the middle of the night. And that was just the short-lived effect of the Overtones.

Using a character card, based on her experience with the Venti trial, could influence her speech and mannerisms.

Would she have to run around in public, shouting “Leave it to me!” and “I will keep a maid’s etiquette in mind!” while carrying a greatsword and hacking enemies into eighteen pieces?

“No—!” Celeste let out a silent, soul-deep wail.

The color, which had just returned to her cheeks in a flush of joy, instantly drained away, leaving her pale.

The taste of power was so, so sweet. But the price of Social Death was getting heavier every single time.

She took a deep breath, forcing herself to calm down.

‘Calm down, Celeste. Rational analysis.”Noelle’s outfit… at least it’s proper knight’s armor.”Even if it’s a maid style… it’s armor first and foremost!’

As she followed this line of thought, a circuit in her brain suddenly connected.

Right!

Knight’s armor appearing on a battlefield was infinitely more normal than a bard’s getup of white tights and a green hat, wasn’t it?

And it was far more suitable for combat than Pela’s clerical uniform, right?!

The more she thought about it, the more sense it made. A faint sense of relief began to bubble up inside her.

‘If I had pulled some limited-time island swimsuit character, that would be true Social Death!”In comparison, what’s a little Maid Knight armor?”It has high defense and high HP! It cuts through iron like butter!”On the battlefield, who gives a damn if there’s some lace on your armor? Good armor is armor that lets you blow up a monster with one swing of your sword!’

Thinking this way, Celeste suddenly found that the purple, shimmering character card looked much more pleasing to the eye.You're reading this on the wrong site. This chapter was translated by Elysian Reads and posted for free at elysianreads.com — if you're seeing it anywhere else, it was copied without permission. Read it at the source so the people who actually did the work get the credit.