Arknights: I'm Pretty Strong With Minecraft — Chapter 64

Chapter 64: Officer Ch’en’s Charm

Afa clutched the rim of the massive, empty iron bucket, his expression a complicated mix of misery and nausea.

“I… I never want to look at another drop of milk as long as I live…”

He let out a resounding, milky burp, his voice pitching into a pathetic whine. After downing that entire bucket in one sitting, his stomach felt less like an organ and more like a churning dairy processing plant.

“Oh, please! This is a specialized miracle cure for Oripathy, alright?” Ivan crossed his arms, looking entirely unbothered.

Just as the words left Ivan’s mouth, a strange, soothing warmth bloomed deep within Afa’s chest, surging rapidly through his veins. Acting on pure instinct, the young guard rolled up his uniform sleeve, exposing the cluster of jagged, ominous Originium crystals embedded in his forearm.

Under the stunned gazes of Ch’en, Hoshiguma, and Afa himself, the hideous black protrusions began to shrink at a terrifying, visible speed!

They melted away like frost exposed to the scorching midday sun, receding until they were nothing more than the size of a grain of rice. Their dangerous, necrotic gray-black hue faded into a stable, almost translucent light gray.

The relentless spread of the infection had completely halted.

“This… this is…”

Afa’s eyes bulged. He reached out with trembling fingers, repeatedly tracing the shrunken remnants of the Originium. He was so overwhelmed by the sheer impossibility of the moment that his words dissolved into incoherent stammers. For an Infected living in the grim reality of Terra, a change like this was nothing short of divine intervention!

Ch’en and Hoshiguma drew in sharp breaths, their faces painted with the absolute shock of having their entire worldview shattered and rebuilt in seconds.

“So…” Ch’en murmured, her usually sharp voice barely above a whisper. “Milk… can actually treat Oripathy?”

“No, don’t get the wrong idea.” Ivan quickly waved a hand to dispel the incoming misunderstanding. “Only the milk I personally provide carries this specific status-clearing effect. Anyone else’s milk is just regular milk. At best, it’ll give you a decent calcium boost.”

Hoshiguma stared at the miraculous transformation on Afa’s arm. She reached out and clapped a heavy hand onto Ivan’s shoulder, her voice thick with emotion.

“It seems… the Lungmen Guard Department owes you yet another massive debt, Ivan.”

Afa, finally managing to reel in his soaring ecstasy, looked down at the empty bucket. A hesitant, deeply embarrassed expression crossed his face.

“Mr. Ivan… then… this specific kind of milk that can suppress Oripathy must be incredibly precious, right? The cows capable of producing something so miraculous… they must be exceptionally rare beasts?”

Ivan blinked, pausing for a moment before scratching the back of his head. He answered with casual, devastating honesty.

“Huh? Actually, those cows are about as common as stray dogs on the street.”

[Cow:??? Me? A stray dog???]

This brutally simple, exaggerated analogy plunged the alleyway into a suffocating silence. Ch’en, Hoshiguma, and Afa suddenly realized that trying to apply Terra’s common sense and concepts of value to Ivan was an exercise in pure futility.

“Alright, the problem is solved. Let’s go, let’s go.” Ivan clapped his hands together, dusting them off as if he had just finished a trivial chore, and immediately turned to slip away.

Hoshiguma quickly called out, stepping forward to stop him.

“Wait! Ivan! You saved Afa’s life today, and… and you actually managed to alleviate his Oripathy.”

This level of kindness was simply too heavy to brush off!

“Tell us, what do you need from us? As long as it falls within the power of the Lungmen Guard Department, we won’t hesitate for a second!”

Ivan paused, glancing back over his shoulder. He flashed Hoshiguma a brilliant, carefree grin and waved his hand dismissively.

“A request? Hey, I haven’t even thought of one yet. Tell you what, Hoshiguma,” Ivan chuckled, his tone light and teasing. “Just remember to treat me to a massive pot of wine when all this blows over! The strongest, absolute best vintage you can find!”

Hearing a demand so simple it bordered on childish, Hoshiguma was momentarily stunned. Then, the realization washed over her—Ivan was deliberately asking for something trivial so they wouldn’t feel burdened by a life debt.

She nodded vigorously, her voice thick with raw emotion but exceptionally firm.

“You rascal… really… Alright!” She grinned, flashing her teeth. “Leave it to me! I’ll make sure you drink until you’re completely satisfied! We’ll go until you pass out under the table!”

“Uh, where exactly are we heading now?” Ivan asked, following the two officers through the winding streets.

Ch’en stopped in front of a quiet, familiar building. Her gaze grew complicated, her usually stern tone softening with an imperceptible trace of nostalgia.

“This is the place… the exact location Afa mentioned in his gathered intel. This is the estate my biological father left behind… I lived here before I left to study in Victoria.”

Hoshiguma surveyed the surrounding perimeter, her brows knitting together in a tight frown.

“What exactly is going on here? Why would the Reunion Movement suddenly dispatch people to investigate your old residence, Ch’en? What possible connection could this place have to their current operational objectives in Lungmen?”

Right at that moment, Ivan clapped his hands together with a sharp, crisp smack, shattering the tense silence. His face lit up with an exaggerated expression of sudden realization.

“Oh—! I know!”

Ch’en and Hoshiguma immediately snapped their attention toward him, both expecting a brilliant tactical deduction or a crucial missing clue.

Ch’en even stepped closer, her amber eyes wide with expectation. “What do you know? Tell us quickly!”

Ivan planted his hands firmly on his hips, puffing out his chest, and delivered his verdict in an incredibly serious, deadpan tone.

“The truth is—Officer Ch’en, you are simply too charming! Even those fanatical Reunion Movement guys can’t resist your allure! They must be your hidden, obsessive fans, secretly digging into your tragic past to feel closer to you.”

The more Ivan spoke, the more he seemed to convince himself, nodding sagely at his own flawless logic.

Ch’en: “…”

Hoshiguma: “…”

A deadly, suffocating silence descended upon the street. A visible vein throbbed on Ch’en’s forehead. Her solemn, expectant expression shattered, instantly replaced by a tempest of pure, unadulterated fury.

Her knuckles turned bone-white as she gripped the hilt of her sword, her teeth grinding together loud enough to be heard. She squeezed a single word out through clenched teeth.

“Ivan—!”

Before the echo of his name even faded, Ch’en spun on her heel. Her slender leg whipped through the air with a vicious whistle, delivering a merciless, perfectly aimed kick squarely to Ivan’s backside!

“Get—out—of—here!!”

“Ouch, damn it!”

Ivan, caught completely off guard by the sudden assault, stumbled several paces forward, flailing his arms before nearly face-planting into the decorative flowerbed lining the street.

Hoshiguma watched the chaotic scene unfold, helplessly burying her face in her palm. Despite the headache, she couldn’t stop the slight, amused curve tugging at the corners of her lips. Even though the current tactical situation was grim, seeing the usually untouchable Ivan get flustered and kicked around always brought a strange sense of comedic relief.

As for the instigator, Ch’en turned around with a sharp huff, crossing her arms over her chest. She pointedly ignored Ivan, who was currently rubbing his bruised backside and grimacing in the dirt. She refocused her intense gaze on the quiet old house, though the tips of her ears were burning a faint, betraying shade of red.

‘This guy never takes a single thing seriously!’

Meanwhile, high up in the Lungmen Chief Executive’s Office, the still-shaken Wei Yenwu had just lifted a delicate porcelain teacup to his lips, desperately trying to calm his frayed nerves.

Suddenly, that eerie, horribly familiar top hat materialized out of thin air, spinning silently in the center of the room. A second later, the inverted, gravity-defying figure of Dinnerbone flickered into existence.

“Pfft—!”

Wei Yenwu violently spat out a mouthful of scalding hot tea, coughing uncontrollably. He fumbled to slam the teacup down onto his mahogany desk, practically springing out of his leather chair in sheer panic.

“Y-Your… Your Excellency?! How… why have you returned so soon?!”

Dinnerbone, hovering upside down with his arms casually crossed over his chest, spoke in a slow, echoing drawl.

“Oh, it is nothing major. I merely experienced a sudden change of heart.” His voice paused, tilting his inverted head. “I believe he still requires a little bit of… ‘exercise.’ Therefore, I demand that you go after Ivan. Do not hold back. Torment him to the absolute brink of death.”

Having delivered this contradictory mandate, the entity seemed highly amused by his own chaotic brilliance, letting out that signature, grating laugh.

“Hahahahahahaha—!”

[Ivan: Damn it, weren’t you supposed to protect me? Dinnerbone! You absolute troublemaker! Get lost!]

Back in the opulent office, Wei Yenwu stood completely petrified, frozen like a statue behind his desk. His expression rapidly cycled through a chaotic spectrum of emotions—from sheer shock, to utter bewilderment, and finally settling into a deep, soul-crushing sense of powerlessness.

What… what in the world was actually happening here?!

One moment, this terrifying entity threatens to annihilate Lungmen if a single hair on Ivan’s head is harmed. The next moment, he demands that Wei Yenwu hunt him down and torment him to death?

Was this so-called ‘god’s’ mind… fundamentally broken?