English
Indonesia
Chinese (Simp)
Japanese
Korean
Spanish
Portuguese
French
German
ArabicAnime Crossover: Eating Evil in a Daily World — Chapter 21
Chapter 21: I Will Take Care of Your Wife, Do Not Worry
“Uh, this…”
Miko’s father stared at the boy standing before his memorial altar, his ghostly features twisting into a mask of pure bewilderment. He didn’t quite know how to respond to the situation unfolding in his own living room.
Offer incense to himself? Why did this entire sequence of events feel so utterly absurd?
“Just kidding.” Yozora shook his head, a dry chuckle escaping his lips.
He struck a match, the sudden flare of orange illuminating his features, and lit the incense stick in his hand. Stepping forward, he planted it firmly in the small burner directly in front of the memorial portrait. Yozora then pressed his palms together, bowed his head slightly, and began to mutter a prayer with the utmost solemnity.
“I hope the deceased will bless me so that every week… no, every day, beautiful girls will throw themselves into my arms. It would be highly optimal if there’s a catgirl in the mix, too. Thanks, thanks.”
Listening to Yozora’s incredibly pious tone deliver such absolutely unhinged content, Miko’s father stood frozen in spectral silence.
Beautiful girls throwing themselves into his arms every day? And he specifically requested a catgirl? Where did this kid even get the confidence to ask for such things?, praying to the deceased for blessings was supposed to be a quiet, intimate ritual done silently. Who openly broadcasted their desires out loud, as if terrified the ghost might be hard of hearing?
The father’s final verdict: this boy was born with a terminally abstract soul.
Shaking his head to cast aside the complicated, tangled emotions weighing down his ghostly chest, Miko’s father coughed twice into his fist and finally spoke.
“Yozora, I can feel that you seem… different from ordinary people.” He paused, suddenly realizing how that sounded, and hurriedly added, “I mean your physical body, not your brain, haha.”
“Are you being sarcastic, old man?”
“I didn’t mean that at all, don’t overthink it.”
Despite the sheer weirdness of the encounter, after just a few sentences of banter, the heavy anxiety that had plagued Miko’s father regarding his daughter’s safety completely evaporated. He didn’t exactly know what type of boy his daughter preferred. But he was ninety-nine percent sure it was definitely not someone as chaotic as Yozora.
Just how abstract was this kid’s personality? It was so potent that it actually forced people to completely ignore his objectively outstanding physical appearance whenever he opened his mouth. All that registered was pure, unfiltered absurdity. When that level of unhinged behavior reached its absolute limit, it transcended into a form of modern art. It was the exact kind of chaotic masterpiece that the great painter Van Gogh had pursued his entire life.
“Alright, enough small talk.”
The lazy, half-lidded amusement vanished from Yozora’s face in a fraction of a second, instantly replaced by a chillingly sharp focus. He looked directly into the eyes of the ghost and slowly lowered his voice.
“Regarding the long sword that Miko and I brought back today… could you sense anything unusual about it?”
“Hmm… yes, there is.” Miko’s father rubbed his chin, his translucent brow furrowing in thought. “Although that blade hasn’t even been unsheathed, before you two even stepped through the front door, I felt a deeply terrifying aura radiating from it. If this place weren’t my home when I was alive, my instincts would have forced me to flee as far away as possible.”
“Is that so.” Yozora pulled out a small black notebook from his pocket, clicking a pen and jotting down the observation. Extremely strong deterrent effect on ordinary spirits.
Without missing a beat, Yozora looked back up. “Do you know if there are any specific locations where evil spirits and ghosts absolutely dare not step foot?”
“Ah, there actually are.” Miko’s father didn’t hesitate, scratching the back of his head as he recalled the information. “There are a few such safe zones, namely…”
As Yozora wrote down the list of locations provided by the ghost, a slight frown creased his forehead. He had fully expected the famous shrines over in Kyoto. After all, he knew the trajectory of Miko’s fate; she was supposed to visit a specific shrine to pray, inadvertently gaining the protection of the shrine spirits to eliminate threats.
But why, nestled right in the middle of a list of sacred, spiritual landmarks, was there an entirely out-of-place location known for its cheap burgers and cheerful atmosphere… McDonald’s?
Are you messing with me, you rascal? Yozora stared at the word on his notepad. The golden arches repelled the forces of darkness?
But on second thought, Miko’s father had absolutely zero reason to deceive him. As the old saying went, the words of a dying man carry absolute truth. Following that exact logic, the words of a man who was already entirely dead had to be super-doubled in their honesty. Most, looking at the weary affection in the ghost’s eyes, the man clearly understood the grim reality of the situation.
Having the Yin-Yang Eyes was not a blessing for Yotsuya Miko. It was a malicious, cruel joke played by the heavens.
“Alright, I have nothing else I need to ask you,” Yozora said, snapping the notebook shut.
Hearing this, Miko’s father nodded. His expression shifted from casual to deeply solemn, his voice dropping into a heavy, pleading register. “Yozora, although this is our very first meeting, I have a request. One that I hope you will definitely agree to.”
“Go ahead. Speak.”
“I hope you can protect Miko’s safety.”
Facing the sincere, desperate plea of a father trying to shield his daughter from beyond the grave, Yozora simply shook his head.
“I’m sorry, but I cannot promise you that.”
Miko’s father froze, stunned. “Why? Why not?”
“First of all, I can barely protect myself in this mess,” Yozora replied, offering a casual shrug and a faint smile. “Secondly, are you entirely sure Miko’s wish is really just to hide away and live a stable, ignorant life?”
The question hung in the air, leaving Miko’s father completely silent. He knew his daughter better than anyone. He knew that although she maintained a stoic, easily frightened exterior, deep down she was an incredibly kind girl who desperately wanted to help those in pain. Could he, as her father, really demand that she abandon her nature, ignore the suffering of others, and only look out for herself?
He couldn’t bring himself to say those words.
Just as the heavy weight of the situation began to crush the ghost’s spirit, Yozora smoothly changed the subject.
“What I can promise you is this: I will find a way to let Miko possess the ability to confront those evil spirits head-on. Just like I do.”
A wave of deep relief washed over Miko’s father. He let out a long, helpless sigh and extended his spectral right hand toward the boy.
“Then I’ll leave her in your hands, Yozora-kun.”
“OK. I will take care of your wife, do not worry.”
The ghost’s hand stopped mid-air. On Miko’s father’s gradually fading, transparent face, an expression of absolute, unadulterated speechlessness materialized. Before his soul completely dissipated into the ether, he managed to force out one final, exasperated sentence.
“You kid… you really opened my eyes.”
Right as the last traces of Yotsuya Miko’s father passed on, the kitchen door swung open. Miko’s mother stepped out into the dining area, carrying a tray of steaming, freshly cooked dishes that filled the room with the rich scent of home cooking.
Before she even had the chance to untie her apron, she spotted the boy sitting respectfully in front of her late husband’s memorial portrait and greeted him with a warm, enthusiastic smile.
“Yozora, come and eat with us!”
The more Touko looked at this boy, the more she felt he was a truly excellent young man. On his very first visit to their home, he hadn’t just brought a polite gift; he had immediately gone to offer incense and pay his respects to Miko’s late father. What an incredibly thoughtful, gentle, and well-mannered child.
“Sister Touko, I actually have some pressing matters to attend to, so I won’t be staying for dinner tonight.”
Hearing a high school boy smoothly call her “Sister”—and using her first name with such casual intimacy—Touko’s cheeks flushed slightly, her smile widening in absolute delight.
“Eh? How can you leave without eating anything?”
“Definitely next time. I really do have a tight schedule today.”
Seeing his polite insistence, Touko didn’t push the matter further. She just smiled warmly and nodded. “Alright then. Please come over to play again whenever you have free time.”
“Definitely, definitely.”
Yozora flashed her a charming smile, then turned and walked toward the living room doorway. He paused, glancing over at Yotsuya Miko, who was currently staring at him with an incredibly complex, deeply suspicious expression.
He offered her a crisp wave.
“Well, I’m heading off. See you at school tomorrow, my dear niece.”
With that final, perfectly executed strike, Yozora spun on his heel and walked straight out the front door before Miko could even process the insult, let alone scream at him.
[Inorin’s Note: “I will take care of your wife” is a famous meme originating from the warlord Cao Cao in the Romance of the Three Kingdoms, heavily used in Chinese internet culture as the ultimate declaration of shamelessness. “Abstract” (抽象) is a popular piece of Chinese internet slang used to describe someone whose behavior is completely unhinged, absurd, or operating on a chaotic wavelength that defies normal human logic.]